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  • Niamh

If I Don't Pick It Up, It Doesn't Get Picked Up


If I don’t pick it up, it doesn’t get picked up… some days it feels like these words are going to end up being my epitaph.

In fact you could sum myself and my husband up like this -

I see mess – I clear it up…

He sees mess – he does not…

I kid you not…I could leave an actual live grenade on the floor and my husband would just walk past it as if he didn’t see it… in fact I’ve probably more chance of the baby picking it up and giving to me than him.

Now either my husband’s got a very serious eye problem that the world’s best optician cannot fix, he doesn’t care or he is just downright oblivious and in my mind it’s the latter 100%.

He is just completely unaware of stuff like this and I hate to say this and dear God I know I’m going to get messages in from the husband lobby, but you know what feck it, I’m just going to say it.

Most husbands need a crash course in noticing the bleedin’ obvious!

I don’t think I’m alone in feeling this way, am I? I mean do any of these scenarios sound familiar?

  • The empty toilet roll that somehow manages to stay on the holder for possibly months until I change it.

  • The [insert ANY item at all] that is RIGHT in front of their eyes but they can’t find it when you ask them to pass it to you.

  • Putting clothes on the child that don’t remotely go together at all, in any way shape or form, because those were the first ones that came to hand.

  • Unloading the dishwasher but not knowing where something like the potato masher goes, so he just leaves it out on the counter… how long have you lived here man??? Of course you know where it goes!

  • When they are suddenly engrossed in their phone or sport on the TV or just a dot on the ceiling when you’re doing fifty million things at once and in need of a hand; like when you’ve a toddler hanging out of you wailing like a banshee, as you try and stir the pot of dinner without it burning or falling on said toddler.

Look, don't get me wrong. I am not the world's tidiest person nor am I a saint (the state of my clothes in the bedroom will tell you that) and there are times when my husband amazes me… the bathroom bin is a case in point. After months (okay years) of lamenting him NEVER EVER bringing the bin out, he now does it quite regularly and the best bit is that I don't have to ask him to do it! He doesn’t mind loading/unloading the dishwasher and you know what, if I asked him he would pick up that grenade on the floor...

He’s an amazing dad, he makes me laugh every single day, I’m very lucky to have him in my life and I know he would do anything for us, but it’s the fact that I have to ask is the really, really irritating thing… does thinking these things make me a bad wife?

Perhaps, perhaps not… but what I do know for sure is that it turns me into the stereotypical nagging wife, so in the end I just do it myself…

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